When Growth Gets Hard

Brothers,

I’ve been a bit quiet this past few weeks. It hasn’t been an easy time. And it will be good to be in your company tonight. The turn from summer to fall holds so much meaning in our culture. It is good to seize the energy of “getting to work,” “getting back to school,” “starting again” ideally refreshed.

I have been going through a period of transition that comes with both hope and grief. I just moved into a new apartment, a small transitional spot less than a ten minute walk to my son. The process of conscious uncoupling from my wife started in June of last year. And it will still be months before all the aspects of separation are done. 

I will gladly share more about the lessons from the journey as I keep finding my way through. But you can imagine that the process of splitting up a family, and walking away from a partnership that was mostly good, is a process that strikes right at the heart of masculinity.

Am I walking away from my role and responsibilities as a man? Am I failing at my most important job, the job of rearing my son? How do I deal with my role in bringing grief to the lives of people I love? How do I welcome my own grief? Especially when I have no doubt that we have made the right choice.

Growth can get really hard. We are especially vulnerable as we change and shed skins. These spaces in-between are rich with potential and possibility. But they are also rife with risks. We can feel lost. And it is hard for men to feel lost. 

So how do I find my grounding even when I don’t have answers?

How can I keep moving forward, even when all I can do is trust time to do what it does?

What do you do when growth gets hard?

How do you let go of the old in order to welcome the new?

When life comes with a challenge, how do you become a better man?

Let’ talk.
See you tonight.

Saludos,

Gibrán