Be an Accomplice

When I was coming up as a young activist and organizer I had to live my way into the myriad conflicts within the movement. I remember noticing a deep misunderstanding of what it meant to diversify the space. An earlier generation of white progressives were making effort to bring people of color to the table they were setting. But it took time and often pain for them to understand that when you bring new people to the table you are going to have a different conversation.

This is the whole point of bringing new people to the table: To change the conversation.

My friend Cyndi Suarez, who you have heard from on the podcast and on our YouTube Show , wrote a brilliant piece for NPQ: 

What Does It Look Like to Support Women of Color to Lead?

It is an interview with Wilnelia Rivera, the brilliant planner and strategist (who I am hoping to have on the YouTube Show soon!). And it is one of the most clear articulations of what it means to actually support women of color to lead. 

Hint: It’s not just about representation.

Wilnelia spells it out. “Allyship,” in progressive circles can too often mean approving an agenda. Not shaping it.

It meant working on what they think are priority solutions versus what we think they are. Are we going to fight for minimum wage, or education equity and get at the root cause? Do we want to approach this from a place of love and joy, or anger, when our people are already struggling with trauma?

That approach manipulates the heart and dedication of women of color. We think that getting a seat the table will move the dial, but they’ll remind you that it’s not your seat, or your table.

Wilnelia’s approach is different. She comes in with the understanding that working with a woman of color means doing work based on her values. A woman of color is more than just this one person. She’s the backbone of her family. She’s the backbone of her community. You are not going to change a woman of color’s loyalty to her family or community. And you are going to have to see her as a whole person.

This is what we are looking for. We are looking for a lived experience. We are looking to align ourselves behind an embodied perspective.

Willie Jackson (h/t Seth Godin) says “Don’t be an Ally, Be an Accomplice.” I like the distinction. When you are an accomplice you are part of subverting a certain order. You are not just naming and calling out. You are conspiring. You are making space. You are shifting the balance of power. Not just adding color to it. 

To seek wisdom is not just to seek direction. When we listen to these voices we are not only seeking answers. We are also looking for better questions.

PS A few days after writing this post I read Vanessa Daniel’s NY Times OpEd: Philanthropists Bench Women of Color, the M.V.P.s of Social Change. It articulates the way implicit bias and a failure of imagination continues to hinder progress on this front.