King, Warrior, Magician, Lover

Do you know men who are interested in nurturing a more conscious masculinity? Invite them to be part of The Better Men Project. We are trying something new in 2021.

The Better Men Project is a heart project. It is a work of atonement for my own sins of patriarchy. It launched about two years ago. We have a monthly call, which is pure medicine. But most participants sign up just to receive weekly reflections on this effort to become better men.

Since May 2019 we have been anchored by adrienne maree brown’s text: Relinquishing the Patriarchy. We wrapped up 2020 with a set of reflections on Brené Brown’s Strong Backs, Soft Fronts and Wild Hearts.

Next year we are going to work through the Jungian classic “King, Warrior, Magician, Lover: Rediscovering the Archetypes of the Mature Masculine” by Robert Moore and Douglas Gillette. The book is 30 years old. It is a dated text. We are going to dig in, learn what there is to learn, and seek ways to update what needs to be updated for our practice.

We have a well developed understanding of toxic masculinity. But we seem to have lost our sense of what conscious masculinity is. Reflecting on the power of this text, Andrew Gurevich explains that:

mature masculinity is not abusive or domineering, but generative, creative, and empowering of the self and others. The authors use mythology, archetypes and ritual to make a clear distinction between immature, toxic expressions of masculinity and the potential emergence of the healthy, mature, nurturing form.

This effort to become better men is not about ideas and ideology. It is not about enacting the tropes of performative wokeness. This is the work of being and becoming. It is a practice. It demands that men come together, turn to one another and take responsibility. This is primal work. And it calls for the sort of mythopoetic engagement that the book invites.

Tell your friends about it. This is the Better Men Project in 2021. And it is going to be great.