Do Good Things
I have spent the last few months enthralled by The Lightbringer Series, a fantasy epic by Brent Weeks. I read this quote towards the end of book 5, and I knew I had to share it with you.
Becoming a good man’s easy. Act like one, even if it’s an act. Some say, ‘Who you are is what you do.’ They’re wrong, but not all wrong. What you do forms who you are. Then who you are forms what you do. It’s a vicious cycle, or a virtuous one, depending. One act doesn’t undo all of who you are, but a thousand acts make you who you are. So it’s simple, though not easy: stop creating the wrong you. Stop trying to prove to yourself that you really are the bad man you believe you are despite what others say, and simply start doing good. Even if deep down you’re a bad man, if what you do every day for the rest of your life is good, you’ll be a bad man indistinguishable from a good one. (Brent Weeks, The Burning White: 5 [Lightbringer] pp. 908-909).
On the one hand, the idea of conscious masculinity can get quite lofty. On the other hand, we can lose our sense of self when we spend too much time grappling with the way patriarchy makes us toxic.
Why not start by doing good things. No need to think too much about it. Just find ways to do good things. They can be small things at first. Small, unrequested favors. Lending someone a hand or an ear. Showing up well to a project or a team. Lifting up the energy in a room with a good heart and a kind smile. Going out of your way, over and over again, building a practice of selflessness.
Let the good things grow and add up. And let time see what you become.
What is the good that you’ll do today?
Saludos,
Gibrán